It seems like it's been awhile since I really stopped to think about things... About everything. It feels like I've lost the ability to think deeply, with a focused mind. Maybe I just need more time to myself. There's only so much I can do nowadays...
Here I go again, failing Him more and more each day... Why does this happen? I thought I was over it already.. But I guess it's never really over. It's a constant struggle that He already expects me to go through. But I really need help, I can't do this alone...
I wonder, am I still being true to myself lately? I don't even know anymore...
I don't understand. I never really expected things to turn out this way.. For awhile now I've resisted, just waiting for the type of person that I know I needed. So why were things different when it came to her?
I honestly don't have a clue how I'm going to bring her to Christ, or if I even have the courage to try hard enough. I keep sensing that she just feels uneasy about all of it. I know I shouldn't be scared, but why am I?
I love her, I really do. But there are times when I ask myself if this is really what's right for me.. I would hate to think that I'm only setting ourselves up for inevitable heartbreak.. Only God knows...
I want to blog everything out a lot more, but I don't know if I should right now.. I really don't know what I'm doing with my life right now, for that matter. Am I even going the right way? I guess only time will tell...
